How Hot WHAT Is? (round 6)

In case you're new; my roommate Nadine cracks me up on an almost daily basis. I've decided to post the best of the best each week.

me: Oh! My water boiled! I forgot about it...
her: For a second there, I thought you said your water broke...
me: Surprise! I'm pregnant.
her: I wouldn't even know where to start.

me: (pointing at a bruise) I walked into a door yesterday.*
her: That's what they all say...

her: Why do I have so much trouble functioning like a normal human being?

(we have had an inundation of couchsurfing requests... we also have a girl-guests only policy.)
me: Ooh, this guy wants to stay with us...He's French and he's a musician!! Can he?
her: Only if he stays in your room. (pause) I have no idea why I said that.

me: There are things that I like about myself.
her: Oh yeah, I'm a total catch!
(notice how she steals the spotlight on that one.)

her: No matter how hot it gets out today, you are not allowed to take off your tights. I don't want to see your bum on the front of the Toronto Sun saying, "This Is How Hot It Is!"

*True story. I have yet to outgrow my awkward adolescent stage.

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Simone Weil: On "Forms of the Implicit Love of God"

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* not with ink

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